The stories we tell ourselves about our phones: meditation and alarm clocks

Part of my phone fast is getting honest about how I use my phone and what role it needs to play in my life. Like the map analogy of looking at the key before diving into navigating, I need to right-size my use of this technology.

Never met a sunrise I didn’t love.

Starting with my average day, I’m looking at the ways I used my phone and noticing how I feel about it now that it is not in that role. On Day 8, I’m thinking about the sleeping with my phone situation and how I justify it.

Sleep + My phone Story

1. I need to be reachable in emergencies
2. I want to let the people I love know that right before I go to sleep and right when I wake up
3. I need my meditation app to go to sleep
4. It feels good to have my phone within arms reach
5. I use my phone as my alarm

Let’s break it down —

1. I need to be reachable in emergencies > I do understand why my brain believes this one. When I helped care for my mom, I felt I needed to be reachable at all times. When I’m not with my kids, I feel the same way. Still, I think the benefit of having my phone in another room during sleeping hours is a better default. If a situation warrants it in my future life, I can put the phone on do not disturb and only allow certain calls through. For me, having my phone(s) plugged in downstairs has been a game changer. I simply cannot have it near me and not be tempted to check it. The desire is waning, but I still think it’s a good policy for me.
2. I want to let the people I love know that right before I go to sleep and right when I wake up > I think this is no less true if I go downstairs and text them good morning when I know they are up or text them right before I leave my phone for the night.
3. I need my meditation app to go to sleep > My daughter and I use the same Insight Timer meditation that is 20 minutes of deep music for the past 10 years. We are probably in the top 1% of listening to this particular meditation. I love Insight Timer because it tells you all the people who are meditating in the world at that moment and it makes the world feel very small. Still, I think depending on my phone for meditation might not be the best way to go to sleep for me and finding other alternatives —#5 below. I still think mindfulness apps are wonderful, but I know I’ll sleep better if I can decouple meditation from my phone.
4. It feels good to have my phone within arms reach > With this exercise, I’m realizing “feeling good” might have been a false sense of security, the desire for dopamine and a tethering to a light and life source of sort.
5. I use my phone as my alarm > I have swapped to a sunrise alarm that we had kicking around in an attempt to have my kids wake up more gently. It has white noise, gentle wake up sounds like birds and water, and settings for two different wake up times. It is slowly lights up when the alarm goes off and is truly lovely. 10/10

Today at work I chatted with a colleague about the fast. He has done one in the past and it struck me what he said. “Half of it is unpacking the lies we tell ourselves.”

Truth.

About my “phone fast,” 30 days of swapping to a Gabb Phone that calls and texts.